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You are now entering the realm of semi-intelligent thoughts. Keep your mind open and your mouth shut!

Saturday, October 04, 2003

Slow Day 

Hey, the counter's at 8! The more the merrier! Unfortunately, the same day I found out that people actually read this page has also been one of the slowest days so far. I can't think of anything to rant about, and nothing's really happening around SU right now. It's just cold and rainy, and a couple guys have been playing football in the study lounge for some reason. Seriously, I have nothing to write about today, although I seem to be writing a lot about the fact that I have nothing to write about. Maybe I can just post a few more random thoughts. First of all, I had to delete a great post about how to deal with French people because it turns out they didn't sell missiles to Iraq as was originally reported...actually, I'm not sure what they decided, but the original story was that Polish troops found 4 French-made anti-aircraft missiles that said "2003" on them, and Chirac denied knowledge of them. From what I understand, France stopped making the kind of missile that they found 10 years ago, and the 2003 was the inspection date (which still sounds a bit strange to me). Don't get me wrong, France still sucks, but this post was really great, and now it's irrelevant. In other totally random news, I was browsing the archives at Townhall.com last night, and I saw something in an article that made me physically sick. Apparently, some kid said "God bless you" to his friend when he sneezed in class, and he was promptly suspended because he may have offended atheist and non-Christian students. That's disgusting. I genuinely thought I was going to vomit for 10 minutes after reading this, and the only way I could stop it was by banging my head on the desk until the pain was distracting enough. That's all I'll say about that particular incident. Some people on my floor had a little fun last night that I could write about. A girl down the hall has a friend visiting for the weekend, and a few guys decided to mess with him and make him think that the entire dorm was insane. To do this, they each played different "characters" when they introduced themselves. For example, my roommate pretended to be gay, another guy wore a cowboy hat and pretended to be a hick, and another one acted drunk and kept falling over and laughing (what's really funny is that this guy actually got lost once when he was drunk, so the character was believable). Apparently it started getting old after a while, and my roommate just said, "okay, that's enough of this gay stuff," and introduced himself. The "drunk" guy, however, continued to act drunk for the next ten minutes. Eventually, he said, "want to know how many drinks I've had tonight?" A couple seconds went by, and then he said, "none!" At this point, the girl chased him down the hall (almost knocking me over in the process, I might add) and started hitting him. That was hilarious. I am really bored right now. I apologize to anyone reading this for the first time. I usually have better material. Go to the archives and read my other stuff, but don't judge the whole page by this post. I decided to try reading through all my posts up to this point, and I timed it at about 50 minutes. That's a decent amount of material for a week. Plus, I read really fast, so other people may take longer. By the way, I have "Another Hole in the Head" from Nickelback's new CD stuck in my head, so it must be good. I should really stop. Actually, now that I have a comments section (which still isn't working completely right), I'll take suggestions from readers. If you have any ideas for stuff I should write about, post to the comments section and tell me. I'm thinking about writing some essays based on the BOSIT entries, but I can't decide which ones to use. I'll see if anyone responds to that. Also, I'll remind people once again that flames, trolls, mindless profanity, etc. will be deleted immediately. I'm serious about that one. In any case, whoever the 5 or 6 people were that read this page today, I hope they come back. I'm going to stop now, but I'll keep checking periodically for suggestions, and I may have an idea later. Remember, there should be some great rants coming up next Tuesday, because I have two papers due on Wednesday. Homework=creativity. It never fails. And remember (recycled line alert), when you assume, you make a Democrat out of the University of Maine...or something like that. Keep those blogs rollin'!

Free Stuff is Cool 

I've got a stats tracker! It took a bit of semi-intelligent thought (HAHAHAHAHA), but I got a Sitemeter tracker on the page. This means that I now officially have a real blog. I can't get much information, but I just wanted to know if anyone was coming here. I hope this isn't a waste of time. Later.

Comments are Operational 

Thanks again to James Finch of VRWC. You can now post comments on SIT, meaning that you don't have to e-mail me to make contact. I'm still working out the bugs (like the exaggerated number next to the word "comments"), but at least the thing works. I'm now working on getting a hit counter, but they haven't sent the html code to me yet, so I may have to wait a few minutes. In any case, I now have a way of knowing people are reading the page without them having to contact me directly, so you can disregard all that crap I wrote before. I feel a lot more professional now. Blogging rules.

I Got One! 

This is a rather exciting day. I just checked my e-mail, and apparently somebody actually read the blog! I'm happy about this, of course, although I am a little nervous, since this means people will actually see my writing now. Also, I've apparently been added to the blogroll at vrwc.us (in the "daily reads" section, no less). In return, I will be adding said site to my links. In reply to that webmaster's question, I cannot add a hit counter or comments section at the present time because I'm using the free version of Blogger, which basically allows me to post and archive, nothing more. I wish I could do more, but being a college student, I don't have enough time or money to add a lot of bells and whistles to the site. In any case, thanks for contacting me, and I hope you're not the only person who ever reads this. Since I have at least one reader now, I suppose I should probably try and focus my efforts a little more, but I think the site is okay the way it is. I'd rather have a place for a journal and political rants than choose one or the other. I know John Hawkins says that lack of a hook is a bad way to attract readers, but I'm going to stick with what I know. That being said, I don't really have any good ideas for today, but I've only been awake for 50 minutes, so maybe something will come to me later. Also, since I will probably be getting readers now, I just want to reiterate that you should only e-mail me if you have something good to say about the site or if you have a suggestion. If I receive anything that I perceive as hate mail, I will delete it using the "report spam" button in AOL Mail. That'll learn 'em. Anyway, I'm glad to be a part of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy, and hopefully this is the start of something big. Blog on!

*UPDATE*
I received an e-mail from James of VRWC, and he told me it is possible to put comments on your blog. I checked it out, and it turns out there's this thing called Blogspeak that's made for people using Blogger (blog is a funny word)! I'm in the process of adding it to the site now, so I should have comments sections by the end of the day. Thanks for the tip!

I'm Tired 

VIGODAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, October 03, 2003

Laughing is Fun 

It is, isn't it? I just got back from Jim Breuer about 20 minutes ago, and I can say that the show was definitely worth the 4 dollars I paid for my ticket. The show got off to a rough start because some guys on one side of the auditorium were chanting, "Jim! Jim! Jim! Jim!" and then a couple people came out to thank us all for showing up, and they got the crap booed out of them. After that, the opening comic, Paul Bond, came on and did some decent material. He needs to lay off the masturbation jokes a little, but other than that, it was good. His funniest joke made the PC types in the audience uncomfortable, but being a Republican, I thought it was great. Want to know what it was? Okay: "You know, when I was a kid, I was Asian, but then I got disoriented." He also invented a word for stupid people who aren't quite at the retarded level. He called them "pretards." I don't care how PC you are, that's funny. He ended with some song parodies, including one called "That's Why I Always Use My Hand (what did I say about the masturbation stuff?)," sung to the tune of John Mayer's "Your Body is a Wonderland." That was a bit awkward, but it was hilarious nonetheless. After that, without even a brief delay, he brought out the half-baked goat, Jim Breuer. This guy is really good. The applause was great, and he had a lot of energy. Now, if you've never seen Jim Breuer perform, you may not realize that he has a slightly different style than other comics. Instead of preparing a routine and telling the same jokes every night, he lets the audience decide which jokes they hear. For example, some guy in the audience yelled "METALLICA!" and Jim did his impression of James Hetfield returning something to a store ("Do you have a receipt?" "YEAAAHHH!!!!"). And then, of course, somebody yelled "Goat Boy!" and Jim ended up telling us the origin of the character and doing a lot of baah-ing. He actually didn't do a lot of new material, but it was great seeing all this stuff live after watching him on TV for so many years. One new bit that was really funny was his story about when he got a job at SNL. He described his thoughts at the time as, "I'm gonna buy a kangaroo!" After that, he hopped around the stage for a while as the audience laughed their a-holes off (is that physically possible?). Another new story was about Dave Chappelle getting his car stolen. The story was pretty funny, but the best part was the visual aid. Jim pointed out that Dave Chappelle is really skinny, and then he just picked up the microphone stand and set it up at the front of the stage. He didn't have to say anything, because we all cracked up at this point. Get it? Microphone stand, skinny black guy? It's hilarious! Oh, yeah. He also talked about how the two of them were planning on doing a spinoff of "Home Improvement." According to Breuer, "He's black, I'm white. He eats chicken, I carry a briefcase (don't get offended; he said it sarcastically)." That was great. He also told a story involving his Joe Pesci impression, and even though I had seen it on TV, it was funnier live. For those familiar with Jim Breuer, he did the "are you gonna thank me for giving you a career" story. He ended the show with a routine that some girls in the audience requested (they even made a sign). This, of course, was the "stomach party" routine. This is where he talks about drinking being like a party, where more and more strangers come in until tequila ruins everything and the stomach says, "everybody, get out!" We gave him a standing ovation at the end of the show, and he brought out an old guy whom he identified as his dad, but we'll never know for sure. In all, it was a great night. I would go there again. I don't really have anything else to blog about today. Unless I think of something else, that's all for today's edition of SIT. I have a long weekend coming up with no football game, so I'll probably be asleep until Tuesday morning. Also, I have two papers due next Wednesday, which means I'll probably get my best ideas for things to post about on Tuesday afternoon. I'm usually the most creative when I've got a lot of homework to do. Remember, laughter is the best medicine. Just don't tell that to a guy with emphysema. Goodnight.

Thursday, October 02, 2003

Happy Anniversary 

Yes, that's right, it's now been one week since Semi-Intelligent Thoughts took on the blogosphere. As far as I know, I haven't gotten any readers yet, but maybe I've gotten thousands and they just haven't e-mailed me...yeah, that must be it. By the way, I've changed my mind about the whole "this page is for my amusement...I don't want a lot of readers" thing. I still don't want a huge audience or anything, because that would be way too much pressure. However, I have decided that I am going to start actively seeking readers next month. By then, I should have almost a hundred posts, which will probably be enough to keep people busy for a while. I'm not sure exactly what steps I'll take, but hopefully my links will get picked up by somebody's spider and lead them back here (I'm not sure if that's how it works because I'm new at this). All I want is maybe 10 or 20 people a day. That's it. Oh, well. I guess I'll have to wait and see. As for today, I can't really think of anything to write about, but I have 20 minutes until I have to go to band practice, so I'll just talk about random stuff. First of all, I was on my way to philosophy this afternoon, and in the midst of a conversation, some girl said, "I had to self-medicate myself." What? I believe that's called a double reflexive. What other person can you self-medicate? Are you schizophrenic? That's almost as annoying as when people say, "my classes start at 8 a.m. in the morning." That's the only 8 a.m. there is! And now, the weather report: The weather up here kind of sucks today. A few people told me that Syracuse gets cold really fast, but I thought it would at least hover in the mid-60's for a few weeks. Apparently I was wrong, because it's windy, rainy, and about 50 degrees. That's not right. If you know anything about Syracuse, you probably know that it snows here more than pretty much any other city in the U.S., so I'm expecting that to start happening by next week. I heard that it snowed on October 13th last year. How pleasant. In other news, the words "gay pride" were written in pink chalk in two different places on the stairs that go down to the campus from my dorm. Okay, we get it, it's frickin' gay pride week. Keep it to yourselves. As for events that I'm actually interested in, Jim Breuer (a.k.a. Goat Boy) is coming here tomorrow, and I've got my ticket all ready to go. I'll post a review or something telling you how he was. Hopefully I won't accidentally walk into the "Big Gay Dance" they're having in the same building. That would be really awkward. I can't really think of anything else to write about right now. Remember, if you are actually reading this (I know that's unlikely after a week), please e-mail me and let me know. I put a link at the top of the page so you don't even have to know my address. Seriously, I want to know if anyone is seeing these. Until next time, drink your milk, get 8 hours of drugs, and don't do sleep.

Wednesday, October 01, 2003

College is Hard, and it's Also Liberal 

Well, it seems I couldn't come up with anything else to blog about today besides that abortion thing. Because I value the readers who will one day find this in the archive, I thought I would just post a quick list of thoughts. First of all, universities are way too liberal. A lot of people know this, but they often don't realize how bad the problem is. I've said before that Syracuse is the best university in America, and I still think that's true, but that doesn't mean I can't criticize them for being way too liberal. I'll just list a few examples here that I would've posted earlier had I been blogging for more than 6 days (yes, tomorrow is SIT's one-week anniversary!)

Bill Clinton spoke at commencement last year, and the students thought it was a good idea. Apparently, however, Rudy Giuliani either was here or was supposed to be here before that, and it made people uncomfortable because he was "too controversial." Now, I may have missed this, but when did Giuliani get impeached for lying under oath about committing adultery and being an accused rapist? Oh, I get it. It was supposed to say "too conservative," but they accidentally printed it as "controversial." Those words are pretty much synonymous these days anyway (yes, Giuliani is too conservative in the mind of a left-wing loony).

Speaking of Clinton, my writing professor made me incredibly angry today, and I don't know how I managed to refrain from leaping out of my chair and beating him over the head with his own giant backpack. Must've been that Christianity stuff that stopped me. Anyway, he was talking about how we often project our fears onto others because we don't like to criticize ourselves. He then said, "We're so afraid of our own lies that we mercilessly persecute our president..." at this point, I thought he was actually going to defend Dubya, but then he said, "...for committing adultery." What the frick is that?! CLINTON LIED UNDER FRICKIN' OATH! THAT'S ILLEGAL! Keep in mind, however, that right after Wesley Clark announced he was running for president, this same professor said, "I think the presidential election has been decided today." When a student asked if Bush was running again, he replied, "Yes, Bush and the huge financial machine that supports him are running." This guy is supposed to teach writing, not mindless political rhetoric.

I've mentioned this already, but it's "Coming Out Week" at SU. Of course, they usually just refer to it as "Gay Pride Week," but that's not the official name. In the lobby of my residence hall, there are rainbow streamers and upside-down pink triangles that say "LGBT Week" and have little smiley faces on them. And while they shamelessly promote homosexuality, they attack Christianity. For example, a gay student was beaten up by a couple of guys using "homophobic language" (they were also drunk, by the way, and not necessarily "gay-haters"), and the school responded by having a ton of support events. Now, I'm not advocating beating up gays, but why do they have to call it "hate crime" and "bias-related?" They were just drunk! They didn't know what they were saying!

To get back to the Christianity thing, a student wrote a letter to the school paper saying that Christianity was to blame for this attack and people need to stop being so dogmatic. The title of the letter was the best. Are you ready for this? It was, "Bible a Useless Moral Guide." Does that seem a little strange to anyone else? "Oh, gays, they're a protected group. Even saying the word 'flag' is a hate crime because it sounds like 'fag.' Christians? Those homophobic bigots (I use that term sarcastically a lot)! They're endangering perfectly normal homosexuals and 'transgenders' (please don't get me started)." If somebody wrote a letter entitled, "Homosexuality Immoral and Unhealthy," they would probably be arrested and charged with hate crime. Does anyone else see the frigging double standard here (I just realized that "frigging" is only cool when spoken)?

Oh, yeah, I almost forgot. They're showing a movie tomorrow called "It's Elementary," and it apparently deals with issues facing homosexuals. Where are they showing it? Why, in the basement of the chapel, of course! Things like this are the reason I don't go to church anymore (sorry if that offends people, but I don't think God ever said "thou shalt go to church," so I think it's optional as long as you read the Bible). Yet another fun little nugget is from an article about Kate Clinton, the lesbian comedienne (I use that term loosely in both the gender and occupational sense) that performed last night. One of her jokes, according to the article, challenged "the 'unquestionable' nature of scripture." She then said that, "the Bible is Google for Christians." Now, I'm not even sure why that's funny, but it's just plain ignorant nonetheless.

To make it worse, the reviewer said that it was one of her funniest jokes of the night. What the F is funny about that? When Dave Atell (that might be spelled wrong) was here and he told a joke calling Riverdance "partly queer with a chance of fag," the reviewer attacked him for "marginalizing" gays and being insensitive. DOUBLE F-ING STANDARD!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!

At the convocation for the Newhouse School of Public Communications (shameless plug alert) the chancellor (I think) said that, among the things communications students should be aware of in current events, we should know that "the war in Iraq is not going well." Did I miss this too? The last time I checked, Saddam Hussein was in hiding, Uday and Qusay were dead, and U.S. soldiers were playing with liberated Iraqi children and protecting people from terrorism. That sounds great to me. I wouldn't want to be there, but I'd rather be there now than a year ago.

There's probably more that could go here, but I have Spanish homework (tarea de casa en la clase de espanol) to do. Among other things that have happened, I had to wait 15 minutes for a washing machine in the laundry room today because some jagoff was using three at once. There should be a rule about that. How can you have enough clothing that you need 3 machines on the same day? I just needed to wash my socks. I have so many that I only need to wash them every 2 weeks, but apparently that was too much to ask of Mr. I'm too Good to Wash Clothing One Load at a Time. Also, a girl was using 3 dryers at once. That's idiotic. Just put all the clothing in one dryer and run it for 80 minutes. It'll dry everything eventually.

What else...my roommate's cell phone just rang...again. I'll talk about him. He was panicking a couple minutes ago because he couldn't find his "Boston Sucks" t-shirt, but he eventually tracked it down, and now he's watching the Red Sox lose to Oakland. This guy is a serious Yankees fan. He roots against Boston even when they're not playing New York! There's probably a lot more stuff I could write about my exciting college career, but I don't want to waste too much of your time.

I'm already wasting mine. I'll end by giving a free advertisement for a great website. Go to the links section and click on IMAO, and you'll discover a vast collection of right-wing comedy by Frank J. This guy is really frickin' funny. He has a way with words that can make any sentence funny. For example, if I were to type, "Cows eat grass in big open fields," it would just be boring. Frank, however, would find a way to make it funny, probably by adding ninjas and saying that he hates monkeys. I'm still reading through his stuff, but what I've read so far is pure genius. Nuke the Moon!!!

It's About Time  

Reading this article gives me hope for the future of humanity. If you didn't click the link, I'll quickly say that there is a ban on partial-birth abortion, or dilation and extraction, or D&X, or cold-blooded child murder, etc. on its way to becoming law. This is frickin' beautiful. If we get rid of D&X, it's only a matter of time before we start challenging all forms of abortion. This is a slippery slope I wouldn't mind sliding down. The type of abortion in question is done in the latest stage of pregnancy where abortion is still legal. According to a description I read at Stand to Reason, the "doctor" basically takes the fetus halfway out of the womb, jams a pair of scissors into its skull, opens it up, and sucks the baby's brain out with a little vacuum-like device. Did I mention the child is alive while they do this? THE CHILD IS ALIVE! WE DON'T EVEN DISSECT FRIGGING FROGS WHILE THEY'RE STILL ALIVE!!!!!!!!! It amazes me that somebody was actually sadistic and heartless enough to legalize this disgusting procedure in the first place, and I wish this ban could've been passed before millions of innocent children were annihilated in the name of "choice." Of course, some left-wing loonies are saying that a ban on PBA is unconstitutional. Aside from the fact that that's what they say about every law Republicans try to pass, why would they think that? Where in the Constitution does it guarantee the right to torture and murder unborn children? I must've slept through that part of my 8th grade civics class, because I really don't remember it. If I can rant a little more, I'll give my position on abortion. It's wrong. There, I said it. Abortion is evil, destructive, idiotic, and barbaric. The only time abortion should be performed is when keeping the baby would kill the mother. That's the only time. And even then, it should be done in a more humane way than this. If a woman can survive a pregnancy, she should not be allowed to have an abortion. Now, in rape cases, I think adoption is an excellent option. There are thousands of people out there waiting to adopt, and they would love to care for a child and relieve a woman of a duty she didn't ask for at the same time. We should do very nasty things to rapists, but we should not punish the children. It's not their fault. And, in terms of pregnancy as a result of consensual sex, I think women deserve what they get. If they're not ready to have a baby, they shouldn't be screwing so much! If you get pregnant because you were too drunk to use birth control or something, it's your own fault and you should deal with it. Adoption comes to mind here, too. I'm sorry this rant isn't more original, but I have a pretty conventional position on abortion, so I can't really say anything new about it. Anyway, I'm pro-choice. I believe women should have the right to choose not to have sex, and they should choose to deal with the consequences if they waive that right. Once a child is conceived, that child inherits the right to life that all innocent humans have. I'm still amazed that some liberals think killing terrorists is racist and imperialistic, but killing babies is a way to exercise constitutional rights. What are these people smoking? All right, I've got work to do. I have another rant in mind on why Fall is the worst season, but I may not get around to that. So, let me leave you with the knowledge that I saw a huge frickin' centipede on my way to Spanish today, and the fire alarm went off 2 minutes before class ended. I'm not saying the centipede started a fire or anything, but two strange things in one day...interesting...

*To read the aforementioned STR piece about D&X, click here.*

Tuesday, September 30, 2003

College is Still Hard 

Did you ever notice how everything is ten times more interesting when you're supposed to be doing homework? I could stare at the wall for an hour and laugh like an idiot the whole time if it meant I didn't have to work. It's incredible how easy it is to not get anything done. Just thought I would make a public service announcement. I have to go now.

More Religious Ranting (do not read if you are not extremely conservative or extremely bored) 

I have laundry to do, so I'm going to make this as quick as possible (that's a lie! This is a rant-a-thon!). I was just reading some statements from the ACLU's homepage about "religious freedom" (I don't remember how I ended up there, but it gave me a rant topic, so here it is), and I think we can now safely say that ACLU stands for "Anti-Christian Lunatics Unite." Seriously. They talk about preventing restriction of civil liberties and upholding the Bill of Rights (or some crap like that), but they seem extremely concerned about eliminating religion. Isn't that odd? An organization that endorses "freedom of religion" is actually encouraging "freedom from religion" (which, according to David Limbaugh, is a real organization. Don't get me started...). Some of the stories in their "religious freedom" section included one about eliminating a moment of silence in schools because the MOS might be used for prayer. Another dealt with how creationism isn't science because it doesn't deal with facts, you know, the usual. That's probably talking about YEC, but the sentiment is still there. Yet another article criticized the voluntary Bible study and prayer sessions conducted by members of the U.S. government. How does this promote religious freedom? By the way, every article I saw was about Christianity. How come we don't hear anything about Hindus with those red dots on their foreheads? That's a public display of religion!

(NOTE: THIS IS SATIRE! REPEAT, SATIRE!) Oh, wait, it's just their culture. It would be intolerant to tell them not to display their religion. But Christianity? That's the tool the evil white patriarchy has used to enslave women and minorities for 2,000 years! If it doesn't stop, we may never enjoy the right to marry members of our own gender, or murder toddlers when they won't stop breaking things, or have sex with frigging 7 year old girls! Those fundamentalist bigots! What makes them think that they can restrict our atheistic freedom with their "Buy-bulls" and their "Jebus H. Chrysler on a Ritz Cracker?" They're even trying to teach our poor, innocent (but expendable until age 5 and do-able at age 6, if we get our way) children that some invisible old man in the sky made the earth out of Play-Doh, plywood, and some Crazy-Glue in the year 6000 B.C. (before conservatives ruined the planet with their crazy stories)!!!! Why, they even think there's this thing called "morality!" Apparently some things we do are "rongg" and others are "riite" or "gudd." If we don't do the "riite" thing, we'll be sent to Helena, Montana, where Santa Claus will roast us over an open fire for eternity! Those fools! Those bigoted, deluded, intolerant fools! Why won't they let us believe whatever idiotic load of prehistoric monkey crap we want? I'll defend a person's right to believe that God is actually a giant hamster, and the Milky Way is his exercise wheel! You see, that's original! These Christians just believe what's written in some book by people from the Middle East. Everyone knows the Quran is the only good book to be written in the Middle East! Those poor Muslims were tired of the evil Christian dictator, Paul James Ashcroft, feeding them to lions, so they talked to Allah and found out that they had a sovereign right to control Israel! And then Allah played with the hamster...well, I forget that part of the story, but it's all detailed in the upcoming ACLU publication, "Why We Must Save Religion from Christians." It's an engrossing look at how the infidels fundamentalist Christians have taken away the freedom of peace-loving martyrs Muslims and have made it impossible to die for Allah and go to heaven to receive 72 young virgin boys to have bisexual relations with while Bill Clinton watches from behind a screen. It then looks at how open-minded, free-thinking, unbiased atheists aren't allowed to go into cult meetings church services and tell the racist homophobic sexist murderers Christians that their God doesn't exist and they're wasting their lives. What's more, Christians won't even let members of their own organizations have religious freedom. Take that Gene Robinson guy, the gay bishop. If his version of Christianity says homosexuality is okay, then it's obviously better than the Bible. What right do those bigots have to say that they have "doctrine?" I understand that doctrine is just a combination of "doctor" and "latrine." See? They can't even come up with a real word! What's that mean? And Catholics are the worst! What right do those fascists in the Catholic church have to tell their priests that they can't molest young boys? Love between a grown man and a young boy is perfectly natural! Can't you see that we obviously evolved the ability to have perfectly fulfilling relationships like this, but the Christians altered our genetics so homosexuals could no longer reproduce? Also, pregnancy used to be a choice all the time. There was a special organ that controlled whether or not a woman (or man, before Christians came along) would get pregnant, but then Noah threw everyone off the boat who had this, leaving just him and his wife and kids. Because they were mutants without natural birth control, they evolved a race of humans that had to use condoms, so in a way, Christians are responsible for unwanted pregnancies! Abortion is just us exercising our religious freedom. After all, the Constitution says that no person will be denied the right to practice their religion. Why should we let Christians and their radical beliefs infringe on our religoius freedom? WHY? OH, I FEEL SO VICTIMIZED...YOU, THE PERSON READING THIS! YOU ARE A RACIST...SEXIST...HOMOPHOBE...UM...
.FASCIST...NAZI...HITLER...ASHCROFT...BUSH...CHENEY...REAGAN...QUAYLE
...LIMBAUGH...SANTORUM...O'REILLY...CHARLIE DANIELS...DENNIS MILLER...KELSEY GRAMMER...GOLDFISH...SIDEWALK...HANGGLIDER...ROOTIN' TOOTIN' HIGH FALUTIN'...YOU SUCK! YOU F***ING SUCK! I HATE YOU! YOU HEAR ME? HEY, LET GO OF ME!!! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO SILENCE ME, YOU INTOLERANT BIGOTED RACIST FASCIST MONO MORADO LAVAPLATOS LOCO KOO KOO KACHOO NI NI NI ECKY ECKY ECKY PIKANG ZOOM BOING ZOWLI ZHIV.....(and so on)

Okay, if you read all the way through that and are not offended, either you're emotionally detached from the world and may be a psychopath, or you completely agree with me. I'm not sure which is scarier. Anyway, that was my attempt at stereotyping the ACLU and other far-left organizations that oppress Christians and conservatives under the banners of "tolerance" and "rights." I said that it was satire, but I sometimes think this is actually how antitheists view Christianity. They don't know what it's about, but they know it's eeeeeeeeevvvvviiiiillllllllll!!!!!!! I also made references to their defense of Muslim terrorists, abortion, and pedophilia (I'm not saying the ACLU endorses all this stuff, but leftists tend to latch onto these issues). I hope you can take a joke, but I also hope this makes you think about what kinds of people are running an organization that is devoted to "liberties." I still have to do laundry. Wow, having a lot of work to do makes me creative. Maybe I can blog full time after Syracuse expels me for not turning in any work. Oh, well. I think I've posted more than enough for today. Later.

*UPDATE*
I was just re-reading this, and I think I may have confused the ACLU with NAMBLA a couple times. Oh, well. I've read Salon.com. I know how lefties think. Sorry if I offended anyone. On the other hand, if you're offended by me making fun of pedophiles, then something is wrong with you.

*UPDATE #2*
It seems this satire was a little more accurate than I thought. Apparently, the ACLU has not only associated with NAMBLA in the past, but has actually defended them. I rest my case.

Moore Links & Religious Rants 

Hey, I've added some new links to the top of the page. I decided to link to Moorewatch.com, Michael Moore Hates America, and Bowling for Truth. In case you haven't figured it out, I don't like Michael Moore. I haven't actually seen "Bowling for Columbine" (I accidentally typed "Blowing for Columbine" a second ago; that's not right), but I know enough about it from "Bowling for Truth" that I can see how much of an idiot this man is. I mentioned earlier that I have seen "Roger and Me" (my Sociology professor showed it), and although MM seems to be telling the truth about GM, he does lie to get into a press conference, and he tries to illegally interview Roger Smith several times. Also, he's really annoying. In any case, his Oscar "acceptance speech" is enough to deserve sites like this to be dedicated to him, so I'm linking them. By the way, if you go to these, you'll find that Moore actually didn't create a documentary, so the Oscar should be revoked. I'm pretty sure there's a page where you can sign a petition asking the Academy to take it away. I put my name on it, and you should too. Enjoy the links. Also, I happened to stumble across a Baptist site a little while ago calling Hugh Ross a heretic (it wasn't Landover Baptist or anything; this one was real). I won't get too far into my specific religious beliefs (you already know I'm a Christian), but I will say that young-earth creationism is one of the main reasons there are so many atheists in the scientific community. If you can't accept that the universe is really old, how can you accept any other scientific findings? The fact that only young-earth believers are finding evidence that the planet is 6,000 years old should tell you that they have an agenda. Everyone else, including many Christians, realizes that science, in this case, is telling the truth. You see, there's this thing called the Hubble Space Telescope...anyway, Hugh Ross is one of the most intelligent Christians in the history of Christianity, and I hate it when these narrow-minded YEC's try to anti-intellectualize the Bible. When the Big-Bang was proposed as the origin of the universe, atheists rejected it because it implied a Creator. I don't understand why these people won't embrace the truth. The only reason they think the Bible says the earth and stars were created at the exact same time is because it was interpreted that way until astronomers discovered otherwise. People used to think the Bible said the planet was flat, but now we know it describes a spherical world. I'm pretty sure there's a reference to "the circle of the earth" in there somewhere, but I haven't read the entire Bible...yet. Again, I'm sorry if you don't really care that much about religious issues, but this stuff bothers me. It's hard enough being a Christian in the 21st century without people spreading foolishness and passing it off as the truth. On another note, if you think it's weird that I consider myself a Christian while reviewing Nickelback CD's and talking about how we should skin Saddam Hussein alive, I understand. You may not agree with my worldview, but if I'm wrong, I'll find out soon enough. I may post more "proper" religious writings in the future to clarify some of my views, so keep checking. And, if you just happen to be a young-earth creationist, I advise you to check out Reasons.org and Godandscience.org. In fact, everyone should see these sites. As I parenthetically noted before, I would probably be an agnostic if I hadn't found these sites. Rich Deem and Hugh Ross are pretty much responsible for the fact that I'm still a Christian today, and if you're not at least somewhat convinced after reading their sites that Jesus Christ is/was/will always be God, then you're doing something that my Philosophy professor taught us is called "cognitive dissonance," where you deny what's obviously true so you can keep doing something you know is detrimental to your well-being. I've been typing for way too long, so I'm proably going to stop. I still have a lot of work to do tonight. Remember, always keep an open mind, but don't open it so much that your brain escapes. That's how liberals are created.

College is Hard 

I really couldn't think of any other title for this post, and that one kind of sums up how I'm feeling today. I don't have any rants or lists (which are my favorite kinds of posts, if you couldn't tell) in mind today, nor do I have that much time to blog. Since I'm a little short on ideas, I'll describe what kind of day I've had. I had a Spanish test today at 9:30 in the morning, which is way too early to be working with another language (I actually have to get up at 7:30, which sucks even more). About 7 minutes after that, I had a Communications test. Want to know how long it took? 80 minutes! It took 80 minutes! It was 25 short answer questions and 2 essays, and it took 80 MINUTES! Now, I realize that this is college and the test was supposed to take the whole class to finish, but 80 minutes?! I spent about 2 hours studying for the dang thing last night, and I still couldn't answer 3 of the questions. Something is wrong with that...hmm, maybe I do have a rant for today. Anyway, I just finished listening to "The Long Road" again, and then I spent a couple minutes watching my roommate yell at the Yankees on TV. I haven't talked about my roommate yet, but I proably will mention him a few more times. This guy is a total New York sports fanatic! He stops everything to watch the Giants, he yells things at the Yankees, and he has a Rangers screen saver on his computer. That's a sign of obsession, folks. It makes me a little nervous. I won't even get into his obsession with the "Rocky" movies. By the way, I don't know if he'll ever find out about me writing this, so I may not be doing a smart thing here. Maybe another time I'll talk about his cell phone issues. Anyway, back to me. It's now 4:36, and I just ate about half a stack of saltines, so I should probably go get some delicious dining hall cuisine pretty soon. After that, I have to wash my socks (I have such an exciting life), read about 150 pages of "Families on the Fault Line," write a one-page response comparing it with "Roger and Me," and then write a two-page "conversation" between me and a one of the sources for my 8 page Writing essay. College is hard. You probably knew that, but if you didn't...you do now. My writing seems to really lack...what's the word...skill. My writing really seems to lack skill today. I wish I had something else to write about, but I guess I can just talk about how college is hard. At least Syracuse is. Maybe someplace like IUP or Pitt (did I mention I'm from Pennsylvania) is easier. Oh yeah, one good thing did happen today. My mom sent me a great article from my hometown's newspaper that makes me quite happy. You see, this guy that picked on me from third grade all the way to tenth grade (that's 7 years) just got arrested for drunk driving. He had previously been in drug rehab, I believe, but he actually got arrested this time. Knowing that this a-hole got what he deserved is sweet enough, but what makes it even sweeter is that I told him years ago that he would be in prison someday and I would be laughing at him. I'm sure it won't be long before he's stealing cars and beating up old people. There's a moral to this story, children: Bullies usually turn into criminals. There's no way around it. I'm at one of the best universities in the country, and he's got a criminal record. It's ultimate justice like this that makes me believe there must be a benevolent God out there, as crazy as some may consider that idea. So, in conclusion, this is CD reminding you to drink your school, stay in drugs, and don't do milk. Later.

Monday, September 29, 2003

Pledge of Allegiance Controversy 

Okay, this story is just asinine. I'm sick of frigging atheists accusing schools of violating the nonexistent rule mandating separation of church and state because they "force" children to say the words "under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance. Since when is this a violation of anything? I think I need to clarify my position on this issue.

As one person is quoted as saying, those two words in the pledge honor our nation's religious heritage, they don't establish a religion. The pledge is what it is. You can't change it just because someone is offended. This kind of thing wouldn't bother me so much if it wasn't always directed at Christians. Even though it just says "under God," which could refer to any monotheistic belief system, every good antitheist knows that those meddling fundamentalists are trying to force traditional Christianity down the throats of our impressionable youth. I mean, give me a break! First the Ten Commandments lawsuit, and now this!

I think the pledge needs to stay the way it is. First of all, nobody is being forced to say "under God." If they don't want to acknowledge God, as ignorant as that is, that's their right. What's more, it's just words. They don't end the pledge with an hour long Bible study session. They say it and then learn how to do long division or something. Now, I can already hear some of the left-wing crowd saying, "Chris, be serious. You conservative fascists are always trying to shut down gay pride events and things like that. Why should you be able to force religion on us?"

I've already explained that, of course. There is no indoctrination or advocacy going on with the Pledge of Allegiance. It's just a few words that people choose to say. In addition, considering all the anti-Christian stuff that's out there, we should be able to keep at least some references to God in our society. Considering the left is all about "tolerance," it amazes me how intolerant they are of any Christian ideals. I can tolerate your stupid events. For example, here at SU, they're celebrating "Coming Out Week," which is devoted to "sexual diversity" and encourages homosexual students to come out of the closet. They're even having a "Big Gay Dance" at the student center on Friday.

Now, that same night, in that same building, I'm going to see Jim Breuer perform some stand-up comedy. Will I go to the gay dance on my way out and start calling them sinners and saying they're going to burn in hell? No, because that would restrict their right to be that way. I personally think homosexuality is wrong and shouldn't be so blatantly encouraged on college campuses, but I'm willing to tolerate it provided I'm not forced to go to any of the events, just as nobody is forced to say "under God."

Of course, if I can give my perspective on gay marriage for a second, this is a different story. That would force people to acknowledge homosexual relationships as legitimate, which would be intolerant of people who believe this practice is wrong. However, there is no law making its way through the states claiming that unless people say, "under God," they will be labeled bigots and theophobes. Why does Christianity get such a bad rap? Why not remove all other religious references in our society? The planets are named after Roman gods! Why weren't atheists offended when people were talking about Mars being close to us last month?

I'll tell you why: because Christianity is seen as their ultimate nemesis, a foe to be vanquished at all costs. Other religions are just seen as part of culture or systems of traditions. No faith has taken as much crap in the last century as Christianity. This is a bit harsh, but I really think that's the way it's going.

A lot of other people are saying this, and I will too: atheism is a religion, albeit a godless one. By removing all references to God, you would be establishing a religion, which is unconstitutional. Okay, that's enough of that. I have to go to band practice. Speaking of band, the SU drumline is going to have a new website pretty soon. I'll probably link to it when it's ready. Until next time, don't let the left hijack religion.

Scattergories Answers 

I'm really mad right now. I'm still locked out of my e-mailbox and I don't know why. I tried re-entering my password, but they said it would take up to two hours to complete the operation. That's just sad. Anyway, I thought I'd follow up my Iraq piece with a slightly lighter post. A couple weeks ago, me and the other members of the SU drumline had a party to celebrate the beginning of the football season. During the party, a few people played a very entertaining game of Scattergories. If you don't know, Scattergories is a game where you're given a list of categories and you have to think of a word that fits in each category and starts with a randomly selected letter. Like I said, this was two weeks ago, so I don't remember everything, but I can recall some of the more outlandish or entertaining answers that people used. Here is a list of those:

Letter=P, Category=political/world leaders
Answers= Pol Pot, Phil Hitler ("Hitler's gay brother")

Letter=F, Category=farm animals
Answer=Falcon

Letter=H, Category=birds
Answer=Hairy Falcon

Letter=H, Category=Things you might yell at someone
Answer="Hey, asshole!"

Letter=D, Category=Vegetables
Answer=Delaware corn

Letter =F, Category=Street names
One guy came up with a real street, but some people said to just make one up, and I suggested "Fake Street" and "Fictional Street." I also could've said, "Fraudulent Street," "False Street," or "Fantasy Street."

I can't really remember any more, although I remember an anecdote about another game where the letter was M and the category was college majors. One girl couldn't come up with anything despite the fact that she was a math major. That's kinda funny. I have to go to writing in about 10 minutes, but if I have time later, I'm going to post my thoughts on another Pledge of Allegiance controversy and why it's idiotic and antitheistic. Until then, blog safely, and don't get locked out of your e-mail.

Some Song Lyrics & Things 

There's a lot of stuff I want to post today, but I have some work to do for my writing class, so I don't have a lot of time. Also, I'm a little angry because I've been locked out of my Syracuse e-mail account by "intruder lockout detection" or something. I have no idea what that means, so I'm hoping it'll reset soon. I want to post my thoughts on an article I just read, and I also have a short list of funny Scattegories answers that I thought some people would enjoy, but I'll only do those things if I have time. For now, I'm posting the lyrics to a song I wrote about the war in Iraq. Before you read them, I'll explain my position. I think the war was the right thing to do. When Dubya (that's what I call President Bush) announced that we were going to war, I wasn't sure what to think. I was kind of on both sides of the issue. On the one hand, I thought George Bush Sr. should've annihilated Hussein when he had the chance 12 years ago, and this seemed like a good way to finish what was begun. On the other hand, I thought this would probably be bad for the economy and put the country at risk. To tell you the truth, I never really gave a flying fokker (another pseudo-swear) about weapons of mass destruction. I knew he had used them once, and I figured that if he wouldn't let weapons inspectors in, he was probably hiding something, but I didn't really care. It wasn't until after the "shock and awe" campaign and the subsequent protests and negative news coverage that I realized how important this war was. Because so many liberals disagreed with it, I immediately assumed that it was probably a good thing, but then I saw "Horrors of Hussein" and "Sons of Saddam" on TV, and I realized just who we were up against. Saddam Hussein is a depraved, murderous, soulless monster, and nobody that evil should be allowed to live on this planet. His sons were almost as bad, and I personally think their deaths were too quick. They should've been buried alive or thrown into a giant meat grinder, or electrocuted to death, or beaten, or some other thing they did to their own people, and if we catch Saddam, we should do something so horrible to him that I won't even describe it here. Now that I think about it, I just watched the movie "Roger and Me" by Michael Moore (don't even get me started on that socialist loony), and it has a scene where a woman clubs a rabbit over the head, hangs it upside down from a tree, and proceeds to skin and gut it. We should do something like that to Hussein and keep his mustache as a trophy. However, we are Americans, and we deal with criminals in a humane way, so just shooting him in the face would accomplish that goal well enough. I'm pretty sure he'll suffer plenty where he's going. Anyway, I now support the war because no innocent human being deserves to be treated the way the Hussein regime treated the Iraqi people. It disgusts me to think that they actually had to live like that. What's worse, we've got morons like Sean Penn saying that Bush is worse than Hussein and America is a dictatorship. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: If America was like prewar Iraq, Sean Penn would be dead by now, because that's what it means to silence dissent! Having someone disagree with you is not the same as being killed because you spoke out against the government! Anyway, now that I've fulfilled the rant quota, here is the song I wrote to better explain my feelings on the subject. It's written in second person to anti-war pacifist lefties. Enjoy.

"Justified"
I keep hearing you say that we did something wrong
We interfered in a place where we didn't belong
And every time a new day arrives
We find we've lost a few more precious lives
But you forget about the ones they're fighting for
The weak, the sick, the hungry, the persecuted and the poor
Maybe you should imagine yourself in their place
Before you stir up controversy just to win a freaking race
(chorus)
It may not be going exactly as we planned
Good people are leaving home and losing their lives in a distant land
But just because a few of our nation's bravest are dead and gone
You can't claim that we've failed and have no right to carry on
Did you even see the things these people were forced to go through?
'Cause by the way you're acting, I'd assume you never knew
Psychotic, despotic, bloodthirsty, and worse he
Killed the innocent without blinking, so what are you thinking?
(chorus)
Think of their situation and put yourself in it
Just picture a world where you could die any minute
Where dictators build palaces and drive fancy cars
While you and your family lie out in the street and starve
You must be realistic, these people were sadistic
Just thinking about it's enough to make you feel sick
If you think the world was better when they were still around
Try digging your loved ones out of a hole in the ground
(chorus)

CHORUS:
How would you like it if your freedom was taken away?
Could you live in a place where you could disappear because of what you say?
You still have the right to disagree because of the people who died
But before you start to complain, just remember it's justified

So, what do you think? I've written 9 or 10 other songs, but this is the only one about the war, so I'm just posting it. The other ones are confidential. I don't want people stealing my lyrics before I get a chance to use them in a real band. Who says drummers can't be songwriters (actually, very few people say that, but they probably think it)? This would be a rock song, so other names for it include:
-Republican rock
-GOP grunge
-Conservative crunch
I really have to do some work now, so it's time for me to stop. Hopefully, I'll have time to post the other 2 things I have in mind, but I have 2 tests tomorrow, so that's probably not gonna happen. We'll see. Vote W in '04 (I know I will).

Sunday, September 28, 2003

More of My Writing 

In my "Links" post, I mentioned that I submitted a satirical piece I wrote to Swordandspirit.com a few months ago. For people who want to read it, I thought I'd link to it here (link is at the bottom of the post) rather than making you track it down. It's called "Proof of the Punch," and it deals with the strange logical tricks that certain anti-Christian types like to use on gullible people. If you don't care about religious issues, you probably should just ignore it. There is an added bonus, however; if you follow this link, you can find out my full name! The suspense must be killing you! In any case, check it out if it sounds interesting. As this blog shows, I do some writing in my spare time, and I'm actually studying to be a screenwriter/director, so me need be good with wordses...oops, that didn't come out right. Maybe tomorrow I'll post the lyrics to a pro-war song I wrote called "Justified." I was going to wait until I have a rock band to use it, but I think it'll be outdated by then. You'll have to check back and see (as if you're reading this the day I posted if). Hey, it's raining. That's great. I thought those big dark clouds meant something. I'm going to stop typing....now....at the end of this sentence....that I'm writing...at....this....exact....precise....specific...moment...in....time....period.

Proof of the Punch

Just Checkin'...Just Checkin'... 

I have a couple real quick notes to post here. First of all, the links I listed yesterday are now available at the top of the page for easier linkage, so you don't have to track down that one post. Also, there is a link at the bottom of the list where you can e-mail me. I have no way to put up a comments section or find out if people are visiting my site, so the only way I'll know you're reading this is if you tell me. I realize I've only been a blogger for 4 days, and I'm not expecting any readers for at least a month or two, but I'd appreciate it if you let me know when you view my site, since I have no way of knowing how many people, if any, are using it. I don't know if I'll post anything else today. I've got a floor meeting to go to in half an hour, so maybe something funny will happen there that I can write about. Last week, they tried to have a meeting while a bunch of people were watching the Giants game (it had gone into overtime by this point), and the meeting ended up only being about 8 seconds long. We'll see what happens.

CD Review- Nickelback: The Long Road 

I'm back once again with a new feature for SIT. I've listened to Nickelback's new CD a couple times, and I think I'm ready to give my personal opinion. Even though this is just a blog, it seems to be a good place for a music review, so I'll switch into "critic" mode at this point. Enjoy. (Warning: Review references song titles which may be offensive to some readers)

If you're listening to "The Long Road" and you hear a faint sucking sound in the background, that's Nickelback's other records in comparison to this one. I'm not saying the others aren't good, but the new one frickin' rocks! NB has finally decided to put a little more power behind their music, and the result sounds a lot like Theory of a Deadman meets Hoobastank.

The musical quality of this CD is my favorite part, if you haven't figured it out yet. There's a lot more heavy stuff on here than on "Silver Side Up." The 2 minute long opener, "Flat on the Floor," sets the tone for the rest of the CD by taking listeners back to NB's "Curb" days with an almost punk tempo and crunchy guitar work by Chad Kroeger and Ryan Peake. Other heavy selections include "Because of You," "Another Hole in the Head," a cover of Elton John's "Saturday Night's Alright (for Fighting)," and "Yanking Out My...(I'm assuming the word "heart" would follow this ellipsis)."

Of course, it wouldn't be Nickelback without a couple of power ballads to satisfy fans of "How You Remind Me," and they pull this off with songs like "Do this Anymore," "Someday," and "Feelin' Way too Damn Good." I'm pretty sure the latter uses the same guitar riff as Denis Leary's "Asshole," but it sounds better here than when a drunken comedian is yodeling over it.

In addition to the heavier guitars, Ryan Vikedal gives his drums a serious workout this time around. He even breaks out a double bass near the end of "Flat on the Floor." Being a drummer myself, I always look for good music that I can "air drum" to (which looks really stupid but is still fun), and many of these songs provide that opportunity, especially "Yanking Out My..." Despite the boost in guitar sound, the songs don't lose the melodic quality that makes NB stand out among many other bands. They still manage to pull off some good guitar solos, and each song has its own personality.

The lyrics on this CD are in a slightly different style than before, although Chad still seems too concerned about relationships. On songs like "Feelin' Way too Damn Good," "Figured You Out," and "Learn the Hard Way," you find out a little more about the singer's sex life than you really want to know, although it seems like a couple of these are meant to be sarcastic and/or ironic. Also, Kroeger made the smart decision of not writing any songs about marijuana like he did on "The State," so drug-free dudes like myself can still enjoy most of it with the exceptions being the stuff I mentioned above.

Chad seems to have avoided the traps of "pop" style lyrics overall, although "Believe it or Not" tries a little too hard to connect with people. A song with an interesting social message is "Throw Yourself Away," which is about the moderately publicized incident in which a girl delivered a baby in the bathroom at her high school prom and threw it in the trash.

In my opinion, this CD is a great follow-up to "Silver Side Up," and it seems like Nickelback has finally found a way to combine the grunge influences of "Curb" and the pop influences of SSU without getting trapped in the middle like they did on "The State (I really don't like that CD)." I'd recommend this to people who enjoyed songs like "Too Bad" and "Just For" on the last CD. If you're looking for more twangy, acoustic style stuff, you may want to look elsewhere. "Should've Listened" and "Someday" may satisfy you, but this CD is more of a hard rocker than anything else.

So, do you want to go out and buy it now? Do ya? Come on, you know you want to! Wait, I don't care if you buy it. Never mind. I think that's all I'm going to post for the time being. I've got some work to do later. As soon as I come up with some more interesting content, I'll blogify it and make it available for the one person who will ever read this besides me. I know you're out there somewhere...somewhere...where...where......that was an echo, in case you couldn't tell. Bye for now.

Alternative Language 

Cool title, isn't it? I decided to end today with another list rather than just leaving you hanging with boring stories about what it's like playing bass drum in a college marching band. This list will be kind of short, but its content is essential to my life. You need to know this: I don't swear when I talk. Never have, never will (I occasionally write profanity, but it's not to be taken seriously). Therefore, I have to use alternative language and pseudo-swearing to get by when I need some speech enhancement. This is a list of a few of my favorite non-profane words and phrases. Enjoy!

-Fudge
-Dang
-Crap (this is one of my favorite words, since it can mean so many things)
-Holy flurking schnit
-Frickin'/friggin'
-F-ing/F-in'
-What the "H?"
-Mothertrucker
-Son of a batch of cookies
-Son of a biscuit
-Son of a ditch
-Son of a vondrook (taken from SNL)
-Buck futter (also taken from SNL)
-Crudpuppies (don't ask, I don't remember how I came up with it either)
-Consarn it
-Fork you
-A-hole
-Arse
-What the hello there, sir. How are you today? Nice weather, isn't it? (okay, I made that one up just now)

I think that's enough. I'm still a Christian, by the way. I just like to have a bit of attitude, and this is a way to be a bad...arse. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Okay, that was stupid, but I do like these words. I don't use some of them very often, but they do come in handy sometimes. Feel free to try any of them in different situations. Since you can say just about anything on TV these days, we need some less common words to start popping up. Spread the word(s)!
I will post again tomorrow, and hopefully I'll be more focused. By the way, remember that old Discovery Channel commercial with the meteors that said "AAAAAHHHH! The atmosphere! AAAAAAAAHHHHH!?" Well, I'm starting a new one: "AAAAAHHHH! The blogosphere! AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!" I think I'll stop now.

I'm Back 

I just got back from visiting my parents and my brother at the Sheraton on campus. It's the first time we've seen each other in a month, and what do we do? We sit there and watch Saturday Night Live: The Best of Chris Kattan. That's a great way to bond as a family. Anyway, the football game was good. Syracuse destroyed Toledo and their funny looking astronaut mascot, and the rain held off long enough for the pep rally to go on as usual. The only difference was that we had to have it twice as far from the Carrier Dome as usual because of some Rosh-Hashannah (I have no idea if this is spelled right) service at the chapel. If you know what I'm talking about, you've probably been here. If you don't, visit SU's website from my links post and check it out. I got the new Nickelback CD, and I'll review it at some point in the next couple days. It should be good. In less pleasant news, I just realized that I have a plate with cheese and stuff on it from my Hot Pockets (which were breathtaking, by the way) and there's no dishwasher in my dorm. This could be a problem. Maybe I can put it in the bathroom sink...no, wait, there's toothpaste and facial hair in there...this could be a serious problem. I don't really know what else to write, so I should probably just stop now. Eventually, I'll have some essays and stuff on here, along with more journal entries and commentary on current events. Keep in mind, however, that I am a college freshman, and any time I spend blogging is probably time I'm supposed to be studying. I have to read 200 pages of "Families on the Fault Line" for my sociology class, so I might want to do that tomorrow instead of being an amateur rock critic. Yeah, I'm out of ideas. I think I'll just leave this until tomorrow, since nobody reads it anyway. I did submit the site to Google earlier today, so maybe someone will stumble across it. Until next time, continue to surf wisely, and don't listen to any sentence containing the word "liberal" unless it also contains an insult. Later.

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